


Couch Potato

by GoneHavocFex



Category: League of Legends
Genre: Ahri is a queen, Alternate Universe - K/DA (League of Legends), Bagels, Dialogue Heavy, Eve is a cat, F/F, Fluff and Humor, Kai'Sa just havin a good time, Kali go grrr, rated g for gay, they be chillin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-25
Updated: 2020-11-25
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:40:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,470
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27712844
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GoneHavocFex/pseuds/GoneHavocFex
Summary: Kai'Sa smiles to herself as she tells them the next hint.
Relationships: Akali/Evelynn (League of Legends)
Comments: 29
Kudos: 324





	Couch Potato

Akali laid on the furry rug with her legs elevated on the couch, her eyes staring intently at the ceiling like Mona Lisa’s face was painted across the beige veneer and mocking her from above.

“Sushi,” she finally gets out.

“Nope.”

She squints narrower and thinks hard.

“Sashimi,” she tries to guess again.

“Not even close.”

“Tempura?”

“It’s not made of seafood.”

“You said it was seafood!” Akai grouches and throws her arms to the sky in frustration.

“That was then, this is now,” Kai’Sa lilts in her delicate accent, her tone rising to sound amused. She was amused. “Concentrate.”

Akali concentrates, and her eyes glare at the apparition of Mona Lisa’s face hovering over her, Mona Lisa does nothing. “What was the hint?”

“Long life.”

“What the heck is long life?”

“You know what it is.”

“Long life ain’t food, homegirl.”

Kai’Sa elbows her not-so-gently on the ribs. “Are you really that dumb?”

“Long life is not a food!” Akali elbows back, but Kai’Sa grabs her arm and does it again. “And I’m not dumb.”

“Dum dee dum dum dum, Akali Tethi is dumb,” she sings and Akali winces at her jabs.

“Ow! Stop that!”

“It’s spaghetti,” a different voice answers.

Kai’Sa clicks her fingers and points at her. “Bingo.”

Akali gapes in disbelief. She faces the dancer with angry eyebrows. “You could have said pasta!”

“Nah, it’d be too easy.”

“It _should_ be easy!”

Ahri smirks from the couch and raises a finger. “Foxy, one. Ninja, zero.”

“We’re taking scores now, huh?” Akali crosses her arms and pouts and feels very cheated on by the two women tittering at her. “You weren’t even a part of this game,” she accuses their band leader.

Ahri’s tail sways over the cushions, she was laying on her stomach with one side of her face squished against a pillow. “I am now.”

“Don’t be a sore loser,” Kai’Sa giggles.

“I’m not a sore loser.” She was a sore loser.

“You are a sore loser,” Kai’Sa states and Ahri nods sagely in mutual agreement.

“Eve,” Akali ends up whining. She turns to the woman on her other side and tugs at her shirt helplessly. “They’re bullying me.”

Evelynn was by her legs, her platinum-hair head perched comfortably on Akali’s tummy and looking pretty unbothered by everything going on. At Akali’s cry, she points a non-threatening finger at the dancer’s general direction without lifting her head.

“Don’t bully her.”

Kai’Sa laughs and mock salutes. “Yes ma’am.”

“Hah!” Akali asserts smugly.

“You’re still a sore loser,” she says and Ahri nods seriously.

“I concur.”

Akali tugs at her girlfriend’s shirt again. “Eeeeve…”

They bully their youngest as the hazy sunlight shone through their glass windows, the glass was misty from the chill of the coming winter and the atmosphere lingered into a drowsy day inside their chalet.

Despite this, they were all clad in casual house-wear; with baggy shirts hanging loosely over their shoulder tops and short pants hugging at their thighs. The only thing that stood out was Akali’s white socks and Kai’Sa’s black beanie on her head.

Fire was crackling in a hearth nearby as a welcoming background noise. Warm and pleasant and secluded from the cold and tucked safely inside their little cottage somewhere in the Alps.

“Donuts.” They go back to their little game.

Kai’Sa shakes her head sardonically. “It’s round. Round like moth balls. Round like pearls. _Roouunnd_.”

“Donuts are round.”

“Not flat-round. _Round_ round,” she puts a new intonation on the italicized word, as if that should make sense. Akali only looks more confused.

She tries to guess. “Pizza?”

“You’re hopeless.”

“It’s round!” Akali defends and Kai’Sa shakes her head in disappointment.

“Takoyaki,” Ahri says.

“Correct.”

“Hah,” Ahri cheers with a smug half-smile aimed at the rapper. “Two points for Foxy.”

Akali pounds the rug above her head. “This is unfair.”

“Ninja, zero.”

“We should have a ref.”

“You don’t make the rules.” Kai’Sa flicks her on the nose. Akali rubs it furiously.

“Eve, you’ll be the ref,” she says.

“Sure.”

“Nuh-uh!” Ahri quickly protests. She raises her head slightly to face the diva. “This is biased. She’ll always let Kali win.”

“Against you? Naturally,” Evelynn replies dryly.

“See?”

Akali grins. “I see this as an absolute win.”

Ahri wags a finger. “No girlfriends allowed in the game.”

“She’s my wife.”

“I’m her wife.”

Ahri tosses a cushion at their direction. Akali catches it. “No lovebirds allowed.”

“You’re snarky.”

“And you’re a sore loser.”

“I AM NOT.”

“Speaking of,” Kai’Sa slaps her hands together loudly to alleviate their attention, “this whole talk of food is making me hungry. Are any of you hungry?”

Almost instantly, a chorus of _‘ayes’_ answer her, and Kai’Sa stands up from the floor with a fond eye roll.

“Nobody kill each other when I’m gone.”

Akali throws a finger gun as Kai’Sa departs to the kitchen, and then she turns to their leader with a naughty glint to her eyes.

Ahri catches her gleam and stares back, eyes narrowed and daring her to advance.

Akali throws the cushion back. It hits Ahri square on the face with a poomf.

“Pillow fight!”

“ _Oh you.”_

She catches the thrown cushion and laughs. “Eve, you’ll be ref!”

Evelynn still seems unperturbed, even as Akali’s stomach rumbles in cycles of chuckles against her head. Evelynn decides that she likes this and proceeds to bury her face deeper within Akali’s shirt.

She hovers an arm between them. “Foul.”

Ahri snickers. “Some referee you are.”

“Red card.”

“She’s doing her best.” Akali caresses her gf’s head with affection. Evelynn preens.

“Green card.”

“Yellow card.” Akali joins in.

“Third-wheel card,” Ahri buts in dryly.

Akali tries to kick her off the couch. “Snarky card.”

“Sore loser card.” Ahri seizes her feet.

She wiggles it. “Let go card.”

“No card.”

“Let go!”

“Stop kicking me off the couch!”

“You lost your couch privileges!” Akali thrashes her legs against the vixen’s grip. “Why do you get the whole couch and we lie on the floor??”

“Take a look and recognize a queen, rogue!” She wrestles her legs as Akali attempts to jab her with the heel of her foot.

“Queens should share the couch!”

“Is that what you think?!”

“Grrr.” Akali goes.

“What did I say about killing each other?” Kai’Sa returns from her kitchen exploits holding a small tray. She gives them a pointed look.

Akali points an accusing finger. “Ahri started it.”

“Evelynn started it.” Ahri redirects the blame. Akali gives an offended huff and immediately curls herself over the diva.

“Leave my woman out of this!”

Evelynn practically purrs under her embrace. Kai’Sa shakes her head, but she’s smiling and her chest bounces from a laugh at the ridiculousness of it all.

“I’ve got bagels.”

The three of them cheer (Evelynn just softly claps her hands before wrapping them around the rapper’s torso).

“Food, food, food,” Akali chants as Kai’Sa settles herself to sit Indian-style by the furry rug.

Under expected circumstance, they end up having a discussion regarding donuts vs bagels.

“No you see,” Akali begins as she raises her bagel in the air, “they’re not so different. If I put enough sprinkles on it then it BECOMES a donut.”

Kai’Sa shakes her head and Ahri nibbles on her bagel in tiny bites. “They’re still not the same,” their dancer says.

“What kind of sprinkles?” Evelynn asks. Akali brings her bagel down and feeds it to her.

“Rainbow sprinkles.”

Evelynn nods in approval as she takes a ginger bite.

“They’re made differently,” Kai’Sa continues. “Donuts are deep fried. Bagels are baked.” This is a serious discussion.

“But they look the same.” Akali points the half-eaten bagel at her.

Kai’Sa stares at her for a moment. “I can go into a philosophical spiel about this if you want.”

“No you win.” Akali shoves the rest of her bagel into her mouth to shut herself up. Ahri laughs at her.

“Loser.”

Akali tries to kick her again. “Share the couch!”

“First come, first serve!”

Kai’Sa takes off her beanie and tosses it somewhere. She weaves a hand through her long hair and lays back down next to the rapper, relishing the warmth as the fire hearth crackles in the background and the bickering of her friends meander along the atmosphere.

Evelynn starts to doze from where she was attached at Akali’s side. Akali pulls her closer.

“Wanna continue the game?” Kai’Sa asks as she looks at the ceiling.

Akali does the same. Mona Lisa isn’t there anymore. “Sure,” she says, and Ahri hums.

“Hint: sticks.”

“What?” Akali blinks.

“French fries,” Ahri answers with ease.

“Correct.”

Akali kicks the vixen again and Ahri grabs hold of her feet. “Stop that!” she laughs.

When they calm down, Evelynn is already asleep, and Kai’Sa smiles to herself as she tells them the next hint.

**Author's Note:**

> im sad send memes


End file.
